Breast....does that offend you?

Today, I came across this article on MSNBC http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14065706/ . I am a faithful reader of babytalk magazine, and many other parenting periodicals. When this magazine arrived at my house last week, I did not even look twice at the cover. I expect to see pictures of breastfeeding in these types of magazines, and it did not faze me that they chose to portray this image as the cover of their Summer issue. However, it has certainly caused a great deal of controversy, and I thought I would share my own two cents worth.

My basic thought on feeding an infant is, a baby has to eat, and as parents, it is our job to feed them. Now really the only two ways to feed a newborn are via breastfeeding or formula. Cow's milk won't cut it. Solids don't make up a big enough part of the diet until age one, so infants need calorie and nutrient laden liquid to help them grow (and no, Carnation Instant Breakfast isn't good enough). So back to our two choices, let's examine them:

Breastfeeding has countless benefits to both baby and mother. First, there's the bonding issue. What better way to get an infant to love you than to be the supplier of all of it's nutrition? There are antibodies in breastmilk that can fend off disease for years. Studies show that a baby who is breastfed for only 3 months has a greater chance of fighting off ear infections for the entire first year of life. Now think about if that breastfeeding is done for a full year or (gasp) even longer. That kid is like a walking antibiotic for itself. Plus, breastmilk is always at hand, ready warmed and doesn't require pre planning. Then there are the benefits for mom. Breastfeeding aids in weight loss in the postpartum months. It has also been linked to women who are breast-cancer free in their post-menopausal years. Even the formula companies post all over their cans "breastmilk is the best nutrition for an infant". I can say, and have said, that breastfeeding trumps any other method of feeding a baby. BUT...after the three month mark, Grady chugged Enfamil and enfamil alone. Why? Well, that brings us to the formula.

Formula is easy. It's more expensive, but the cost can be worth it for people like me, who discovered the one drawback to breastfeeding...it is HARD. It takes an unbelievable amount of commitment and time. Formula has most of the nutrients of breastmilk, none of the antibodies, but it comes with a gurantee...you know your kid is getting fed. I worried incessantly that Grady was not getting enough to eat. I also had NO idea what a huge chunk of time breastfeeding takes up in the course of a day. Grady would nurse for 30 minutes at a time, then by the time he burped, spit up four times, had a diaper change and took a catnap, it was time to start the process all over again. I felt like I was chained to my boppy (nursing pillow). Add on the fact that every time Grady latched on, I felt like a pirhana was biting my nipple, and formula became an appealing option. I tried calling lactation consultants, and pumping, but after crying my way through for 3 months, I had had enough. So Grady got "the devils brew" as some very pro breastfeeding "lactivists" call formula. He is now healthy as a horse, weighs 22 pounds and is quite advanced for his age in many skills. Oh, but it must be said that he has never had an ear infection, so the three month rule must work.

Ok, so what does that all have to do with the controversy? Everything. Despite the fact that Grady drank formula, I am very pro breastfeeding. I am pro formula feeding too. I just want those babies to be fed. Whenever, however, and wherever they need to be. Every time I pulled out a bottle at the mall I got oohs and aahs from everyone passing by as I fed my little boy. I tried nursing in public once (and only once) and I got dirty looks and hushed "tsk tsk-ing". One elderly woman told me I should use the restroom to "do that". For the record, no one has ever asked me to eat my Chick-fil-A while seated on a toilet...that would be unsanitary, right? Also for the record, breastfeeding in public is permitted by law in every state, yet America as a whole is somehow appaled by the thought of a mother using the tool God gave her to feed her child. The breast has become an oversexed object of the woman's body. However, those same people will walk by Victorias secret or a Maxim magazine and not bat an eye. I have seen teenagers at Busch Gardens with bikini tops that barely cover the nipple, and no one asking them to step into the restroom.

Now let me clarify, I was not just walking through the food court in the mall with my boobie hanging out. I was seated, on a bench in a quiet part of the mall. I had a blanket draped over my shoulder. All people could see were Grady's tiny little socks poking out from under the blanket, and it still offended them. Because they were offended, I was embarrased. It was one of the reasons I switched to formula. I was not as educated then as I am now. I do not condemn anyone for making any legal parenting choice they see fit, as long as it does not put my child in danger.

Fast forward to today. There is a magazine cover out that portrays a baby eating from its mother's breast. You do not see the nipple, you do not see more of the breast than you would see on the cover of Cosmo. Yet there is uproar. One mother shredded the cover so her 13 year old would not look at it. In my opinion, all that is doing is teaching the young boy that a breast is a dirty thing, and sexualizing it more. Believe me, there is nothing sexy about a breast when it is being used for breastfeeding. They are swollen, leaky and smell like sour milk most of the time. But to a baby, it's heaven. I am not saying that all mothers should breastfeed, in fact, I think there are definately times when it is not an option. I am torn on the government's new stand to encourage breastfeeding. While I think it's a great thing for them to support, I don't think they are going about it in the right way. Anyone who has seen the commercial of a pregnant woman riding a mechanical bull knows what I am referring to. I don't feel that people who formula feed are endangering the life of their child (obviously), but there are people out there who do have that mindset, and I am ok with them as people. I guess where I am trying to go with this, is to spread the word (very slowly, based on the number of people who read this blog) that breastfeeding is not bad. Breasts are not bad. Why are you offended? The next time you smile at the lady feeding her baby a bottle at the mall, try to smile at the lady next to her with the baby's head covering what you can't see but know is there, or at the very least, don't scowl.